When we hear the words, “horrible rank”, we don’t just hear them, we smell them.
I worked at Sunset Lake Camp for several summers. On a day off, I went to the beach with my sister. Driving back to camp we got stuck in traffic between Tacoma and Seattle. It was hot and slow. Then it started to stink. It was a horrible rank and I knew what it was.
As a teenager I had really stinky feet. It was at a level that I was uncomfortable taking my shoes off when visiting someone’s home or participating in foot washing services at church. In that slow, hot traffic jam, I was wearing sandals. I apologized to my sister. We rolled down the windows, but the smell only got worse. We were both amazed at how strong the smell was. I got discouraged and complained to my sister, “I can’t stand my own smell! Am I ever going to grow out of this?”
After about 45 minutes of this the traffic sped up and we saw what was causing the slowdown. A butcher truck had crashed and dumped its load. The highway was half blocked with decomposing animals. Other drivers may have been disgusted. I was relieved. That horrible rank wasn’t me.
There is a horrible rank worse than the butcher truck. It’s worse than any rank we can detect with our sense of smell. It’s an emotional stench. This horrible rank is the impulse to rank ourselves against everyone else. I’m smarter, she’s prettier, I am less educated, he’s less motivated, I’m above them, they are so far above me… We obsessively assess how we stack up with those around us. The horrible rank doesn’t do us any good. It traps us in a hot, slow, stinky existence. Our constant struggle with feelings of inferiority and superiority is exhausting.
Imagine, what could life be like without the horrible rank?
In 2 Corinthians chapters 11 and 12 we get to watch Paul navigate his own temptation with the horrible rank. In his boasting, comparing, and defending of self he seems to give in to the horrible rank. In the end, Paul arrives at a truth-filled conclusion that could spare us from the horrible rank altogether.
Paul’s Temptation with the Horrible Rank
Paul’s boastful rant made him feel foolish, but he felt he was forced into it. 2 Corinthians 12:11 says, “I have been a fool! You forced me to it, for I ought to have been commended by you.” This sounds so silly. It’s like saying, “If only you would give me more compliments I wouldn’t have to boast so much!” How was he forced? How was he not commended? Have you ever noticed that there is a defensive, even sarcastic, tone in Paul’s 2nd letter to the Corinthians (i.e. verse 12-13)? Something was bugging him.
In chapter 11 verse 2 Paul said he was jealous for the Corinthians with a godly jealousy. The godly part is that Paul didn’t want them to be drawn away from the faith by false teachers (11:5-15). There is another kind of jealous. It’s the kind James describes when he says, “For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice.” (James 3:16). This jealous was Paul’s invitation to engage in the horrible rank. He wished to establish his rank over these false teachers. Paul mockingly referred to the false teachers as “super-apostles” (12:15). Paul was a true apostle, but these false teachers were getting all the attention. Paul was balancing a fine line between godly jealousy and the horrible rank.
In chapter 11 verse 6 we see that Paul felt the weight of inferiority as a public speaker. I always think of Paul, the great evangelist, as a gifted speaker. Apparently, he wasn’t the best. He heard some of the talk that was floating around Corinth. They said, “His letters are weighty and strong, but his bodily presence is weak, and his speech of no account.” Paul, feeling a bit of the horrible rank, admitted he was unskilled at speaking but even if the super-apostles were more eloquent, he had more knowledge (11:6).
There is a strong temptation to engaged in the horrible rank when someone does the same thing you do, only better. We may admit their superiority but quickly add excuses like, “Well if I had their budget…”, or “Yeah, but I had to work for everything I have while he just…” Stop, stop! If we go down this road it will just get slow, hot and stinky.
In chapter 11 verse 7 Paul asks, “Or did I commit a sin in humbling myself so that you might be exalted, because I preached God’s gospel to you free of charge?” Paul had given a lot to the Corinthians. He lived among them and taught the gospel while supporting himself as a tentmaker for a year and a half (Acts 18). He was willing to “spend and be spent” for their souls (12:15). Corinth was a city known for immortality. Paul put in the hard work to gain their confidence and plant a church. Those super-apostles hadn’t given anything close to what Paul had. We are especially vulnerable to the horrible rank when we have put in the hard work, and it seems to go unnoticed while someone else walks in like they are the hero.
Paul deserved some credit. Like he said in 12:11, they should have commended him. Instead, they were discrediting him and giving credit to the false teachers. Paul got defensive. He had to defend little things like that he had valid reasons for his change of travel plans (1:15-23). Apparently, he heard the rumor from Corinth that he was unreliable. He had to defend large things like his own credentials as a minister (3:1-3). He even had to defend his love for the Corinthians (11:11). Paul deserved credit. Instead, he got criticism. That will draw us into the horrible rank. We feel your temptation, Paul.
Finally, Paul gave in to the boasting (11:18-32). You know the feeling of knowing you probably shouldn’t say it, but you just can’t stop yourself? Paul was experiencing that. It might not do any good, but it sure felt good. Sure, there was genuine concern for their spiritual health. And then there was concern for recognition.
After a long, impressive list Paul calmed down and concluded that he would boast in his weakness (12:5-10). Oh good, he brought a solid spiritual point out of what was borderline horrible rank. We would do well to be ok with being weak. That would help us avoid the horrible rank. But don’t stop there. What Paul says next reveals the two truths that will enable us to disengage from the horrible rank. Here it is in verse 11.
The Truth
2 Corinthians 12:11 I have been a fool! You forced me to it, for I ought to have been commended by you. For I was not at all inferior to these super-apostles, even though I am nothing.
1st Truth: Nobody’s better than me. Paul said, “For I was not at all inferior to these super-apostles.” Paul exposed the lie of inferiority. This is not arrogance. To say, “nobody’s better than me” is not a statement of superiority but of non-inferiority.
2nd Truth: I’m no better than anybody. Paul said, “even though I am nothing.” Paul exposed the lie of superiority. This is not self-depreciation. To say, “I’m no better than anybody” is not a statement of inferiority but of non-superiority.
Inferiority and superiority are lies. Between us and every other person is an equal sign (=), not a greater than (>) or less than (<) sign. The horrible rank is based on lies. To defend against it we must throw truth at it. The truth is that nobody’s better than me and I’m no better than anybody.
Inferiority and superiority are not opposite ends of the spectrum of self-esteem, they are two expressions of the same problem, a deceived self-image. Alfred Adler was a psychotherapist whose pioneering work in individual psychology was overshadowed by Sigmond Freud. He identified the feelings of inferiority and superiority as the foundations of all human motivation. He argued that superiority and inferiority complexes are not opposite personality traits, rather they coexist within us. He defined “superiority complex” as a psychological defense mechanism that compensates for an inferiority complex.”[i] We cannot treat feelings of inferiority with superiority or the other way around. Instead, we expose them with truth.
The truths that nobody is better than me and that I am no better than anybody is supported all throughout scripture by the value that God places on all human life. Nobody is better than me! God created me, he loves me, he died for me! I’m no better than anybody! God created them, he loves them, he died for them!
Isaiah 43:4 Because you are precious in my eyes, and honored, and I love you.
Zechariah 2:8 He who touches you touches the apple of his eye.
The value that God places on all human life is the reason I can look at the person with the nice stuff, the great skill, the perfect appearance, and the enviable spiritual life and I can say, “nobody’s better than me”.
The value that God places on all human life is the reason I can look at the person who is poor, irritating, socially awkward, physically handicapped, mentally handicapped, mean, criminal, or unattractive and I can say, “I’m no better than anybody.”
There is available to us such a security in the truth of who we are in Christ that we can endure humiliation, injustice, accusation and all kinds of horrible rank and still be able to say, “nobody’s better than me and I’m no better than anybody.”
I’m not talking about individual skill sets but personal value. I’m not self-deceived. If I was to play one-on-one basketball with Kevin Durant or to sing a duet with Andrea Bocelli, I wouldn’t walk away from those experiences saying, “nobody’s better than me”. Their skills are superior to mine, but they are not better than me. Value is not about what we think we can do but who God says we are.
How could it change your life?
Not only is it true that nobody is better than me and that I am no better than anybody, it’s also good. In addition to avoiding the negatives of the horrible rank there are huge positives of living in these truths.
These truths deepen our experience of grace. Back in verse 12 Paul tells us what God told him, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” We have messed up but because of grace nobody is better than us. Grace erases inferiority. When we are tempted to feel above someone, we can remember that God’s grace extends to them too. They messed up too but they are not inferior.
These truths deepen our experience of love. God communicates to us that nobody is better than us through the love we received from others. Feeling inferior? Maybe you have a mom who thinks your amazing. Maybe you have a dog who is convinced that nobody is better than you. If you have these cheerleaders in your life receive them as the voice of God telling you that nobody is better. It works the other way too. The Spirit empowers us to love others (see Paul’s feelings of other centered love toward the Corinthians in 12:14-15 & 13:9). It is hard to love them when we are obsessed with outranking them. But if love gets a hold of us, we don’t need to be better, we want to make them better. We don’t need to lift self-higher, we seek to lift others higher.
These truths reverse our expertise of weakness and greatness. Because of these truths Paul could boast in his weakness and say, “when I am weak, then I am strong” (12:9-10). Weakness is ok when we are not trapped in the horrible rank. Jesus flipped greatness upside down and said that the great one is the own who serves (Luke 22:26-27). If we are great in some way, we should not be proud. If they are great in some way, we should not be envious. Rather, we should pray for the great ones because the higher the rank the higher the risk.
These truths change our experience with Jesus. In the horrible rank all the attention goes to us and them. When we disengage, our attention can go to Jesus. All of Paul’s weakness talk was “For the sake of Christ” (2 Corinthians 12:10). He didn’t want to rank high, he wanted to experience Christ’s power (v. 9). He may not have ranked the highest in eloquence (10:10; 11:6) but instead he spoke with a demonstration of the Spirit’s power (1 Corinthians 2:4). All the effort put into establishing rank could be put into experiencing Jesus.
Life in truth starts to smell pretty good. This is why Paul can write, “But thanks be to God, who in Christ always leads us in triumphal procession, and through us spreads the fragrance of the knowledge of him everywhere. For we are the aroma of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing.” (2 Corinthians 2:14-15).
Disengage from the horrible rank. Nobody’s better than you. You are no better than anybody.
[i] Superiority and inferiority complex; effect on young minds | Glocal Khabar